For the first time in a long time it feels like I’m swimming with the stream, not against it. Floating effortlessly. Due to broken chains and freedom found, or due to captivation of something unexpected, I know not. Knowing only I’ve been given a gift, like a flavour of cake never tasted, or the revival of a mystery forgotten, now moulding away far from sight. It is the strangest of sensations and I surrender fear free of consequence. Then without any preparation fear tugs at my heartstrings.
Cheesecake tells me everything that I do, I do seductively. It is a double sided coin that has yet to be tossed to my benefit. In the past, I once was little more than someone’s fantasy. A wet dream to cling to in moments of drought. Then and there, doing my best on a balance board between fighting and surrendering, advances and retreats. But whom of flesh and bone can fight a dream?
Peacefully floating along the stream I refuse to take up arms and be a soldier once again. I am since long drained of blood. No dreams of my own haunts my nights nor enchant my days. I lie of course, but uncertain at which part holds the worse untruth, I allow the river to take me where it pleases. Surrendering my destiny to a flip of a coin.